Concerning the Upstairs Bathroom, by Kiera Lesley
Read it here in about 15 minutes.
Thinking about why I love it…
This story is written in the form of a letter from a house seller to its purchaser. As such, it’s written as direct address to the reader (‘you’), using semi-formal estate agent type language (‘I’m sorry to inform you’, ‘terms of sale’, ‘building inspector’), combined with supernatural-related language (‘monster’, ‘demon’, ‘pain vapours’).
The opening is cheery, casual, and straightforward (‘Congratulations on the purchase of your new home!’), and this tone continues (‘The next morning, I did the only logical thing and called a plumber.’), despite the increasingly strange and disturbing events the letter details (‘I started to feed it… with mice’). I like this mixture; it’s unexpected, which creates humour instead of all out horror, and considering some of the things the house seller does to guinea pigs, birds, and rabbits, the humour makes the story palatable!
Despite being a letter, the story still develops, with an increase of tension as the house seller is forced to commit more and more obscene acts, until they experience an epiphany and sell the house. Ultimately, the writer’s initial apologies (‘Sorry.’) and final well-wishes (‘Good luck,’) do not seem genuine, and who could really blame them?
